A Writer's Brain Radio

Ever wanted to know what goes through a writer's mind as she's writing? Look no more!

Is this sentence too long? It's the opening sentence, it's too long and confusing, and the reader will stop reading and never read my book!

If I cut it into two sentences, does it turn into blah utilitarian prose and the reader will be bored and stop? Was it stylish in the first place, or does it just have too many dependent clauses?

I don't know what I'm doing. But they gave me money, so I must be able to do something.

F*** it. Just leave it. I clearly can't tell any more. Keep going.

Oh, look there, crap, I did that thing again, where I didn't break the paragraph at the important place. Insert paragraph mark! There! Something accomplished!

Or should the paragraph mark go one sentence earlier?

AGH!

You loser, stop dithering and put some more words down.

Oh, look, someone wearing a nice pair of boots just walked by.

Words! Write words!

Come on. One hundred words and you can stop. Well, two hundred. No, really five hundred.

Etc.